New Beginning

 The night air is warm. I know it is, but I am cold. I close my bedroom window, lie down, and pull the blanket up to my chin.

As the cars pass in the street outside, their headlights steadily pull shadows of trees and buildings across the ceiling. 

Static, painted flowers laboriously climb vines in the sun-bleached wallpaper. Crisp, brighter shapes mark out where furniture once stood. 

The window, bare of curtains, is a square full of star-studded night sky. 

Downstairs, the living room and the kitchen are full of unpacked boxes. Some of them are labelled in spidery black ink, listing their contents. Others, overlooked in the frenzy of moving, remain anonymous.

Straps of brown packing tape hold together the fabric of my life. Knives and forks. Passport and social security card. Socks. A box of mementoes are fragmented evidence that the ghosts of my memories were once vital and living, 

The bed is unfamiliar. I pull the blanket up a little higher. 

My eye falls on a rolled sheet of white paper, leaning against more unpacked boxes stacked by the bedroom door. Fat, twisted rubber bands hold the paper in a tight coil. I watch it for a moment, then carefully sit up. I slip out of the bed, and quickly cross the room. I pick up the roll of paper, and pull off the rubber bands with snapping, twanging sounds. The roll of paper falls open, revealing a magical image of an enchanting girl who smiles and winks at me. She is photographed in black and white, but her beguiling mouth is soaked in a rich red. Behind her, stretched out beyond a balcony, lies the glittering city of New York. Chubby lumps of blu-tac are still sucked to the corners of the poster. I hold the image against the wall, and press the blu-tac with my thumbs until it sticks to the wallpaper.

The girl instantly throws out warmth, friendliness and familiarity. 

I take a few slow steps backwards, my hands clasped behind my back. Then I turn to climb back into the bed. 

‘Why dontcha come with me?’

I spin so fast I pull a muscle in my neck, my heart thumping in my throat. I look about the room wildly, but there is no one in there but me. And yet the soft, light voice I just heard is chuckling – a beautiful sound like tumbling bells.

I turn to look up at the poster. The girl has her hands on her hips, and she is openly laughing at me. My hand creeps up and touches my chest. ‘Me?’ I manage to squeak out.

‘That’s right, you!’ she laughs again, and holds out her fingers. The starlight from the window sparkles on the grainy tones of her photographed skin. I reach out and take her hand, and instantly feel a strange force push through me. My feet leave the ground as I warp into a new reality. I’m standing on the balcony of a hotel in New York City, the sounds of the traffic from the road below swelling up into the night air.  French doors, which by rights should lead back into my bedroom, swing open to reveal a chandelier showered ballroom. A party is in full swing, with a live band, dancing and grandeur. 

‘C’mon!’ cries the girl, grabbing my hand, and I trip into the party behind her, my cotton nightdress tangling in my legs.  It’s a whirl of faces, cocktails and magic. I’m having a great time. For a while, I lose my glamorous friend, but later I spot her on the balcony again. She’s beckoning to me. I head out there, and feel the cool of the night air on my cheeks as I look out over the beautiful city. When I turn back to the girl, she is gone. I look back through the French doors, and the party has also gone. Instead, I see the bedroom, my new bed cold and empty. I stand for a minute, my fingers fastened around the iron railings of the balcony, summoning all my powers to stay within the twilight reality of the poster. As I strain my ears to keep hearing the traffic, smell the night air, I can feel it all fading away around me, like water swirling down a drain. In a moment, I am standing again in the bedroom, alone. I open my eyes. Behind me, the poster hangs on the wall, unchanged, flat, and two-dimensional. I sigh quietly. I step to the little window, pull back the latch and push it open. Down below, lies New York City - vast, glittering, and waiting to be discovered. I make the decision that it’s going to be a fantastic new chapter in my life.